Last Christmas Second Entry
by magnipisika16
Summary: Last Christmas, I gave you my heart. But the very next day, you gave it away. This year, to save me from tears. I'll give it to someone special. Last Christmas Series! Christmas Special


**Okay! Another entry to the Last Christmas series! This is Last Christmas, BelxFran version :3 (dedicated to my dear friend Fran-Sama! Merry Christmas, Buddy!)**

**Enjoy!**

_Last Christmas . . ._

"Well, I'm off now," he said as he leaped into the balcony railings, staring up into the cold winter sky.

"This soon?" I asked, following him. "I mean, it's Christmas, after all!"

He sighed, and then stared at me.

"What are you saying?"

"I'm not saying anything!" I placed my arms behind my head, and gave my award-winning Cheshire cat smile.

"I know you, Belphegor," he continued, peering through his purple, patterned cap. "You don't give that much damn about the yuletide spirit. I know for a fact that you want to say something to me. Might as well say it now, for we don't know what's going to happen next."

I erased the smile on my face, and replaced with a serious countenance.

"Why are you leaving?" I demanded. "It's so not like you at all! What can you possibly get from joining the battle? What, are they paying you or something?"

"No," he answered simply.

"Then why?" I prodded again.

He looked away again, unto the dark, blue sky.

"Because it is my duty as an Arcobaleno."

"So?" I cried, loosing my patience with him. "Since when did you give a shit about being an Arcobaleno?"

"Since Millefiore started to take its toll to the things I care about. . ."

"Like what?"

"You, for instance," he blurted out, facing me again.

That got me.

I looked away, not wanting to meet his eyes for a moment.

"Ever since that family came in the scene, a lot of havoc has taken place. Truthfully, I didn't care about those catastrophes that have taken forth. Not until the Vongolas started to stick their noses to the chaos. I know for a fact they will soon ask assistance from us Varia!"

"So what if they do?" I reasoned out again. "It's not like the boss would want to do something about it. And even if, by some miracle, he did, that still doesn't matter! We can take 'em! All of us Varia!"

He didn't answer for a long time. I knew I got him. I knew I was right. I knew he believed me. I knew he's going to stop and stay. Mammon-chan would stay. I just know he will.

"True as that may be," he started. I looked at him and almost begged for him to not say a word for I'm afraid that he might just say something that would convince me as well. But, alas, a prince can never beg. No matter how much the moment would push him to.

"I'm afraid even I believe that Varia does not have what it takes against Millefiore," he continued.

"What are you saying?" I cried out stubbornly. Varia? No chance against Millefiore? Is he out of his mind? Why, we're the best of them all! Doesn't he know that? He's a Varia member for a long time and he doesn't know that?

"The truth, Belphegor," he stressed with a hint of annoyance. "For now, we can't go against them. They're just going to overwhelm us, I'm sure of it."

"And what makes you so sure that you and that little posse of infants will be able to do something about it?"

"I didn't say anything like that. Personally, I doubt that even the Arcobalenos will be able to do anything about it. But, I'd rather take a chance with them rather than with you."

"And why w—"

"Because I don't care about them, but you mean the world to me, Belphegor!"

I stared unto him. That little figure that I used to joke around with every mission. That little figure that always got my back. That little figure that engulfed me in my own special illusion and helped me escape the harshness of reality. That little figure who became my reason to keep going without ever giving up. That little figure that held my unattainable and fragile heart . . .

. . . Was leaving me . . .

Like how the rest of the world left me.

"Mammon-chan, I . . ." My voice trailed off. I can't say anything anymore. Every bit of me hurts now.

"Sorry if I ruined your Christmas for you, Bel," he whispered. "I know how much you look forward to it."

He was right. I loved Christmas. It's one of the very few things I actually appreciate in this cruel injustice that which we call "reality". I loved everything about it. The white snow, the presents, the food, the lights, the merriment—everything. It's the only time in the year where I get what I want for real.

Yet, why won't Mammon stay? I want him to stay, so why won't he?

"Goodbye, Belphegor. Merry Christmas," he tenderly nodded, and then leaped away.

Involuntarily, my feet dragged me onto the railings, and there I watched Mammon disappear into the darkness.

"Goodbye, Mammon-chan," I found myself muttering into the darkness of oblivion. "Merry Christmas."

Will Mammon-chan ever come back?

The prince doubts.

Was it really a merry Christmas?

No, it is not.

Not without Mammon.

Nothing will ever be the same without him.

"Has Mammon left?" Lussuria asked, peering into the balcony. I didn't answer. Please, I didn't need to. Isn't it goddamn obvious?

"Oh, I guess he did," he concluded cheerfully. "By the way, Bel-chan, the dinner's about to start~!"

His voice sounded mellifluous and cheerful, like he didn't give that much care about what happened.

"VOOOIIII!" I heard Squalo cry. "Hey, Lussuria! What's taking you so long? The Boss is already hungry!"

"Coming~!" Lussuria called out. "I'm just going to go call Bel-chan, alright?"

Again, I felt him stare at me, but, still, I didn't answer.

"Okay, suit yourself, Bel-chan," he cooed, and I heard him walk away.

Varia . . . They're celebrating Christmas. _My _Christmas. The Christmas I established with Mammon. Truthfully, I should be celebrating with them, shouldn't I? I mean, it was _my _Christmas after all.

I looked up and watched a snowflake fall down onto my face. More came after. I can't believe it. It was snowing. One of the things I enjoyed during Christmas.

Although . . . Why can't I seem to smile?

Oh wait, I know the answer to that.

Because even if they were soft snow, they felt like hard rocks falling onto my head. Even if there are presents, none of them contained what I really wanted. Even if there was food, far as the eye could see, I didn't have the stomach to eat anything but my own words. Even if there were lights, I only found myself getting blinded by them. Even if there was merriment, all I could feel was wretchedness.

In case you haven't noticed, the prince does not feel like it is Christmas at all.

_But the very next day . . ._

Reality is cruel.

I always believed that.

This is the reason why I live in my own fantasy world. A world where I will never get hurt by anyone. A world where I'm my own person and everyone else were but measly toys that I get to play with and throw away when I get tired of. My world. The prince's world.

When I met Mammon, I was careful not to let him break its barriers.

But, he did.

And so therefore, he became a part of it.

I groaned as I heard the stupid noise from outside. Goddamit', it's too early for this.

"Putrid birds," I hissed, reaching out to the nearby desk, and used my hand to search for my knives. When I finally reached it, I suddenly realized that my window was closed, and my knives had no door of exits.

Fuck it.

I struggled up from my loving bed, and walked towards the windowpane, and tried to open it. It wouldn't budge.

That's when I finally realized that it was impossible for bird-chirpings to reach my room. Besides, it was winter. If birds had brains, they'd be flying somewhere else where it's warm.

So, that leaves the question of where the noise came from.

I listened intently, and realized that it wasn't bird-chirping, but rather Lussuria chatting away. I was supposed to shrug it off and go back to sleep but I realized that there was resentment in the atmosphere as he spoke. That seemed strange, now.

I felt my heart lurch. Or, maybe it was my empty stomach, but either way, I know for a fact that something lurched.

Something bad happened. I'm sure of it.

Quickly, I reached for my coat, and started running, fiddling with its zipper. When I reached downstairs, I found that the whole Varia was grouped already in the meeting room. They all looked the same way—scowling and ridiculous (well, Levi was, anyway).

"Good morning, Bel-chan!" Lussuria greeted, and I know for a fact that his voice cracked. "You woke up a little too early, haven't you?"

There was something terribly wrong here. Otherwise, there wouldn't be this mournful atmosphere that was coming over the whole assassination team.

"Cut the crap, Lussuria," I shushed. "The prince is not an idiot. Something happened and the prince wants to know what it is."

"Oh, I'm sorry, but I don't know what you're talking about . . ."

"Just tell him and get this over with," Squalo growled.

Lussuria sighed submissively with a very unconvincing smile.

"Okay then," he shrugged. "The Vongolas gave us a call, you see. They gave us an update about the battle between the Arcobalenos and the Millefiore family."

Arcobalenos . . . Mammon?

"And?" I pushed, desperate to hear more.

"Well, it . . . didn't go quite well . . ."

"Just cut to the chase!" I cried, loosing my cool. "How's Mammon?"

"Oh, him, of course," Lussuria said thoughtfully, unaware that the suspense is killing me. "I believe he was saved by one of his fellow Arcobalenos. I think his name was Colonello?"

My heart started to slow down.

"So where's Mammon now?" I asked hopefully, willing to barge into wherever those Vongola geeks brought him to.

"Belphegor, he . . ." His voice trailed off.

"He what?"

"He killed himself."

My heart stopped. I lost track of its existence. I couldn't feel anything. Should I be crying? I would believe so, but, how come nothing would come out? My eyes were still dry.

Mammon.

Why?

They gave you another chance to live, did they not?

Why'd you thrown that chance away?

Don't you want to come back, Mammon-chan?

Is living that bad that you chose to end it?

But then, what about me, Mammon-chan?

I need you. So very badly.

Without you, my special illusion will fade. The world we established together will die away to nothingness and I'd be pushed back to reality again.

And reality, like what I've told you before, is cruel.

_This year . . ._

"Senpai," he called at me monotonously. I ignored him, and just enjoyed as the warm water dropped on my bare body.

I just love taking a hot shower during winter.

"Senpai," he called again, and I heard the bathroom door open. Still I didn't move, nor did I response.

To my surprise, the glass door slid open, and I was bombarded by his emotionless face. I yelped in shock, but he didn't seem to care even if he was face-to-face with my utterly too gorgeous body.

"What do you want, brat?" I asked, not showing any care with his sudden invasion in my private time.

He didn't answer. He just stared.

"Ushishishi . . ." I laughed. "Getting a good look, eh, FroggyBoy?"

"Senpai," he finally said, looking up at me. "You need to work out more."

Okay, what the fuck?

He pointed out his index finger, and started poking my stomach.

"See?" he commented. "Too flabby . . ."

I got pissed off.

_Nobody _gets a good look of my superhuman anatomy and then tells me I'm _fat_!

"Why, you little . . .!" I cried, pulling him into the shower with me.

"Senpai, please," he said again monotonously. "That flabby body of yours disturbs me."

"Let's see who's flabby," I cried, pretending to tear off his clothes.

"Bel-chan~! Fran-chan~!" we heard Lussuria call out. "Time for dinner!"

We looked at each other for a moment, and then I pushed him out the shower.

Later, we were already sitting on the couch, being showered by various stares from the other Varia members—I in my bathrobe, and he absolutely drenching wet.

"I see that the two of you had gotten along quite well," Lussuria commented.

"What have you two been doing in the shower?" Squalo asked—no, make that "shouted".

"Nothin'," I said teasingly, looking away.

"Senpai pulled me in the showers," Fran voluntarily spoke, raising his hand up high like a child.

"He did?"

"_He _started it," I reasoned out.

"Okay, okay," Lussuria invited. "We're not going anywhere if we argued about this. Why don't we open up the presents before we eat? How does that sound?"

"Great," I said, standing up. "The prince got a little something for the little frog peasant . . ."

They all stared at me with disbelief. I just laughed as I lifted the biggest box and placed it on his lap.

"That is one big something," Levi commented.

Fran looked at it emotionlessly.

"What are you waiting for, peasant?" I asked impatiently. "Open it!"

"I'm not sure if I could trust you," he replied, shaking the box. "How can I be certain that this won't explode if I opened it?"

"By opening it, idiot."

He stared at me, shrugged, and then opened it.

"Ushishishi . . ."

He just stared at it.

"VOOOII! Well, show us what it is!"

Fran reached in the box, and pulled out a giant Frog-shaped hoodie.

"You got me a giant Frog's head for Christmas?" he asked.

"It's a hoodie, ya' Dickhead!" I corrected him, snatching it from his hand, and placing it on his head.

"Oh . . ." He moved his hands around the circular hat, and then tilted his head.

"I still don't get why you got me this, Senpai."

"I think I know," Lussuria claimed, brushing a tear away.

Yup, you guessed it right.

It was in memory of Mammon-chan.

A year has already passed since Mammon's death. Back then I swore I'd never celebrate Christmas ever again. My world was already in shambles and was doomed to completely deteriorating without Mammon-chan to be there for me. But that was until Varia hired a new illusionist.

He looked just like you, Mammon-chan.

I couldn't help but feel wistful when I first laid eyes on him.

The way he talks and the way he treats me was not the way you did, but still, I saw you in him.

I saw my special illusion in him.

My special world.

He came, and unconsciously, he rebuilt everything that was destroyed the moment you left.

Thank you, Mammon.

I don't know why, but I know you've got something to do with this.

_I gave you my heart_

_You gave it away_

_To save me from tears_

"Hey, Froggy," I called out. He turned around and looked at me, and for a split second, I felt like I saw Mammon-chan. "Merry Christmas."

_I'll give it to someone special_

**-FIN-**

**Yeah, I know. Quite a long time since my first BelFran fanfic. Sorry, but I got so worked up in making LalxColonello fanfics that I took a break in making yaoi (as if I made more than one).**

**Anyway, guys, this fic is actually part of a collaboration between me and akumachigiri0827! This is kind of our way of celebrating Christmas! Oh, and don't be surprised if I, and akumachigiri0827 as well, would have numerous (well, a few anyway) fanfics with the same title and summary. It's part of the collab, ya' see.**

**Please read akumachigiri0827's fics as well. She's GOOD. As in, much, much better than I am! I bow down to the great glory of her fics! **

**Okay, I think I've said enough! Thank you for your support for the Christmas Collab 2011! I wish you all the best this Christmas!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**LoveLots~3**


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